The Price of Nice

1. “Nice” behavior is not reliable as the nice person explodes in unexpected rage or withdraws in passive aggressive sulking.
2. Because of the chronic “niceness”,  others can never be sure if the nice guy could endure a confrontation if it occurred spontaneously which limits intimacy.
3. “Nice” guys stifle the growth of others by avoiding giving genuine feedback and deprive others of a real person to assert against.
4. “Nice” behavior  will ultimately be distrusted by others as it generates uncertainty and lack of safety in others who can’t be sure they will be supported in a crisis situation by the nice person.
5. By holding anger and desires in,  the “nice” person may suffer psychosomatic consequences.
6. “Nice” behavior is a cover up and very unreal placing severe limitations on intimacy,  creating loneliness with the “nice” person being the victim.

Today I can admit this was me and although I may not be “there”,  I have definitely made progress in this area and pray to be “real”,  not “nice” in all my relationships so they may thrive and endure!